paperlined.org
apps > +gender

document updated 13 years ago, on Sep 25, 2011

It can be very strange talking to cisgender people sometimes. There is a huge gap in understanding, a whole lexicon that they don't understand yet. Trying to explain ideas to cisgender people is sometimes like trying to translate into another language — every word has to be translated, and the final communication may end up being kind of imprecise.

Add to that, the fact that "You don't owe anyone an explanation", means that you have to come up with simple and quick ways of conveying your identity to acquaintances, even though that's pretty hard.

You basically end up using vast oversimplifications in the beginning, with more accurate representations taking increasing amounts of time to communicate. It's like peeling an onion.

bisexual transgender lesbian	"Bisexual" is not accurate, but it's expedient when people don't know me well. There's an apparent contradiction between "bisexual" and "lesbian", but "lesbian" is a meaning-rich word that conveys a lot of useful info in a short space.
pansexual trans-dyke
pan poly kinky trans dyke	Probably the most accurate short phrase, but many of these words are unfamiliar to folks, and a whole string of unfamiliar words almost sounds like parody to them.
gender: genderqueer leaning femme attraction: pan leaning femme role: switch leaning bottom	even more accurate